It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Randomize
