I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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