If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
