Non-Jews are for practice
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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