Buhtt sex?
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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