Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
