maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
