So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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