singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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