So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
