I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
