quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize