I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I think people are normalizing furries
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
