I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize