We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize
