: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
