Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Randomize
