i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
