careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
