What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Randomize
