I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
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