He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize