i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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