you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize
