just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Randomize
