called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
