so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Randomize
