So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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