he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
