It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize