is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
