scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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