I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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