I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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