so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
im holly from the hills drunk
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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