Soap is not a condiment
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Randomize
