and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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