Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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