Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
