Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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