The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
