Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
