Please, let me fuck your mom
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
They are going to name an STD after you.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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