I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
