did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Randomize
