I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Randomize
