even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
