His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize