glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Randomize
