I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
