I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
